I lost some important people in the last year and a half. People that I said I would take over everyone else, because they were in my life for so long and I came to love them more than anything else. I think it's a lot to lose in that small amount of time.
One of them, though, I was actually lucky enough to keep around as a friend. One of them; I just had too much history together as a couple, and we couldn't stay friends. And then the last one I actually tried to talk to recently to try and do something about it. We had gotten into a fight and never resolved anything. Surprisingly, there were a lot of people that wanted us to talk again. It took me a year to do so, but I finally said something to him.
What really surprises me though is that he actually didn't have anything to say. I guess I should be glad it didn't really hurt. I guess enough time has passed so that I'm basically fine without him. I only sent him a message anyways just from the spur of the moment from having a nice day.
I don't know. Maybe he's just thinking about what to say? Either way, I guess I don't really care.
What I do care about is the fact that I've been dwelling on my pain and loneliness for over a year now, and I'm finally ready to get better and move on. I think when someone like Alex comes into your life and you have nothing to do but complain about other people leaving you rather than eing glad you have someone now, then it's time to start picking up the pieces.
I talked to mom a little about now that I have a job, I can start saving up and one day I'll move to Seattle. I'm guessing I could do this in a year or so? She's cool with that which is good. Now I have to talk about trying to get some professional help while I'm still here in Georgia. I'll have to see how that goes.
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