Emotional day.

Today was pretty bumpy. I felt a lot of different emotions today. I was in a good mood during work, because it was just me and Andrew, and he's always making me laugh. We got a lot of work done on our own, too, even while goofing around. For lunch, we both had Zaxby's which is my favorite food in the world. I was extremely stuff after that and it felt like my stomach was sticking out 5 inches, but it was totally worth it. I don't really look forward to working, but I'm really enjoying what it's doing for me. I recognize that I'm in a better mood when I'm working and hanging out with my new friends.

Afterwards, when I was home, I started feeling really angry. Then my mom really pissed me off, and sent me off the edge. She really sparks no positive feelings in me at all, and the sooner I get out of here, the better. I was so angry, that I talked my older brother Jason about it some and he had a lot of advice to give me. I really appreciated it. Later on, though, I started feeling angry again. Alex told me to take my own advice and go out, and punch on the punching bag. After I started to calm down from that, I felt better. I was in a better mood. Of course, Alex was keeping me company, though.

As far as Alex goes, we've been doing really well. I came up with some rules for myself to make sure we're always on each other's good side. I really really hate when we're not getting along. One of those rules is a little confusing, though. I still haven't figured it out, but it's about how much I can talk to her or pester her mainly about a problem I'm having. I've been coming to her about my problems some, but I try to back off a lot because I don't want to annoy her. She's been coming to me with her problems, too. It makes me feel good that she considers me to be important enough for that. I don't know if it's because of when I told her about how I wish I was important to her, or if it's just a coincidence.

I do know that I have a new rule. It has nothing to do with her doing something to upset me, or anything like that. In fact, I'm not even upset about it. But tonight, she sent me a picture which made me happy. I was really happy to see her after so long. I hadn't even realized it'd been so long. But I started flirting with her about her boobs, and....it didn't feel right. I was uncomfortable about it. It has nothing to do with my feelings about her or anything. It's just taboo I guess. I don't know. I'm sure I made her uncomfortable, or I probably just came off as a bro. Either way, I think I'll stay away from that topic. 

After everything, though, I feel better now. I let some anger out, and I'm calm; a lot calmer than I've been in a while, and it's nice.