I kind of feel like I'm in the back seat of things. You know when you're in a car with some friends, and the other two are up front talking and it's hard to really have any attention given your way because you're in the back. Maybe they'll look back and ask if I'm alright, but then they go back to their own thing and leave you alone. And I really do feel alone. I feel like the guy everyone comes to with their problems.

It's been a while since anyone asked how I've been. I guess I've become unapproachable by acting like everything's okay. In a way, everything is okay I suppose. But I'm tired of being alone, and I want someone to talk to or someone that cares about how I've been. Yeah, I got my friends but they're just friends. I miss connecting on a deeper level.

Some stupid girl keeps whining to me about her ex messing with her, and I mean, I'm not going to just say whatever. I like to help others feel better, but it makes me feel worse when they do and then just go on about their day. It's like, you know...that's all I'm good to talk about?

Yeah, people are selfish and I did the whole selfish thing for a while. But lately, I'm back to my old self and I'm tired of hating everything. I guess the price for doing so is remembering the pain in everything. I just want to be important to someone.

I found out Alex has an STD and something else. She got a biopsy, and I became really worried. I realized I'd go mental if she were to not exist anymore. But I think everything will be fine.