I was thinking about how I wish I could go back to how things were this past summer when I just got a new job, I kept quiet and to myself, and sat on a bench and read during my lunch. Things were quiet and simple, and I don't know why no matter how bad a situation was, I end up romanticizing everything. The fact is that I was miserable.

I guess after time has passed, you kind of forget the little things like how you were feeling exactly and you just remember the general idea of what life was like. I guess I rather remember it like that than remember it as dealing with a break up and being depressed. The funny thing, which isn't so funny, is that I'm still dealing with those things, but the feeling's duller.

These days, I have friends at work, girls to go on dates with, and it all feels so empty. None of it is doing anything for me long term wise. At work, I'm generally fine, but then I get home and I sit around waiting for something. I have lots of distractions and they help, but I just want what I had when I was dating Emily; a fullness.